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Marty Batfreak, ex Marty B, is a DJ in Sydney, Australia, since '91 (and he's been around since '72). He loves music, and he'll probably love your music too, as long as you're not a rising nu-rave star. Years of radio fun has him @ Killakast.com in '08. Now, he's a Daddy... Liam is 2, and a lot of fun. google Batfreak / fukjamum / timezup / dissico for more of his online audio antics.
Tuesday, June 29, 2004
RIGHT? WRONG! - more of the same....
WHEN she dumps you for Them, because They're a better kisser, just be sad till school's over for the day.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Tell her the gym teacher reckons They're a lousy root, though.
WHEN the street press gives your debut album the thumbs down as boring and unoriginal, ignore them and keep writing.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Plagiariase the fucker ad nauseum eternal in some obscure website.
WHEN the babysitter cancels for the 3rd time, get a new one.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Ring the school nurse, to share your concern as a citizen about a student's blossoming sexuality...
WHEN a friend goes off the rails on speed or coke, forgive them, they'll clean up eventually.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Always have some 'gear' handy... lines of free, household grade, cleaning powder.
WHEN your house party won't go home, be a good host, and wait.... RIGHT?
WRONG! No one likes smell of gas!... Where's the kitchen?
WHEN all they can think of for a personal present is a personal chqeue, say thankyou and buy something nice.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Give it back at the next opportunity - it says it all! Very equivocal, very egalitarian.
WHEN your students insist on farting throughout class, open a window and remind them it's childish.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Make them form TWO lines: one inspects the other for farts pending, then they SWAP!
WHEN in Australia, get ready to learn NO WORRIES, SHE'S APPLES and TOO EASY, and use them in everyday chat.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Keep them guessing: 'TOO APPLES', 'HALF A WORRY'.... etc
WHEN a mate's trying to get his band started, hell, everyone needs a roadie - help 'em out!... RIGHT?
WRONG! Audition each band member for the suitability of being a good boss.
All you need is love, RIGHT? WRONG! $ex $ells!
WHEN you get a public servant who seems to ignore the bleeding obvious before questioning you, you just nod and affirm the obvious. RIGHT?
WRONG! Bring along a mate to act as English Interpreter (they're handy both ways, and it is your Right to have one)
WHEN someone you don't know for at least a year wants to live with you, at all, ever, you remember what a good samaritan is, and say yes. RIGHT?
WRONG! Get their bank account details, and test the details, it's Today's Sign of Trust !
WHEN you can't get your public liability policy renewed, cancel the event and help destroy modern entertainment. RIGHT?
WRONG! Run the event, and put the insurance company on the posters as a PRIMARY SPONSOR - their marketing department will probably foot the bill!
WHEN your middle-management supervisor complains that ''it's not my decision, I feel awful about this '' while he fires you, make him feel better by leaving quietly. RIGHT?
WRONG! Make him feel better with a punch in the face, GIVING him a reason to feel awful.
WHEN your ISP hassles you for money (while the rates continue to rise), just pay them, it's worth it. RIGHT?
WRONG! Tell them certain AOL executives won't be getting their ''special Christmas eCards'' this year, unless your accounts are left intact.
WHEN you're DJing a party, and some punter thinks requests are still cool, you say 'Ok, sure'. RIGHT?
WRONG! Ask them for $1, or $2 for 3 tracks, then tell them where your SLOT is located.
...and that'll do for Winter. Been busy, gang, listen to me at batfreak.sevcom.com
WHEN she dumps you for Them, because They're a better kisser, just be sad till school's over for the day.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Tell her the gym teacher reckons They're a lousy root, though.
WHEN the street press gives your debut album the thumbs down as boring and unoriginal, ignore them and keep writing.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Plagiariase the fucker ad nauseum eternal in some obscure website.
WHEN the babysitter cancels for the 3rd time, get a new one.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Ring the school nurse, to share your concern as a citizen about a student's blossoming sexuality...
WHEN a friend goes off the rails on speed or coke, forgive them, they'll clean up eventually.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Always have some 'gear' handy... lines of free, household grade, cleaning powder.
WHEN your house party won't go home, be a good host, and wait.... RIGHT?
WRONG! No one likes smell of gas!... Where's the kitchen?
WHEN all they can think of for a personal present is a personal chqeue, say thankyou and buy something nice.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Give it back at the next opportunity - it says it all! Very equivocal, very egalitarian.
WHEN your students insist on farting throughout class, open a window and remind them it's childish.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Make them form TWO lines: one inspects the other for farts pending, then they SWAP!
WHEN in Australia, get ready to learn NO WORRIES, SHE'S APPLES and TOO EASY, and use them in everyday chat.... RIGHT?
WRONG! Keep them guessing: 'TOO APPLES', 'HALF A WORRY'.... etc
WHEN a mate's trying to get his band started, hell, everyone needs a roadie - help 'em out!... RIGHT?
WRONG! Audition each band member for the suitability of being a good boss.
All you need is love, RIGHT? WRONG! $ex $ells!
WHEN you get a public servant who seems to ignore the bleeding obvious before questioning you, you just nod and affirm the obvious. RIGHT?
WRONG! Bring along a mate to act as English Interpreter (they're handy both ways, and it is your Right to have one)
WHEN someone you don't know for at least a year wants to live with you, at all, ever, you remember what a good samaritan is, and say yes. RIGHT?
WRONG! Get their bank account details, and test the details, it's Today's Sign of Trust !
WHEN you can't get your public liability policy renewed, cancel the event and help destroy modern entertainment. RIGHT?
WRONG! Run the event, and put the insurance company on the posters as a PRIMARY SPONSOR - their marketing department will probably foot the bill!
WHEN your middle-management supervisor complains that ''it's not my decision, I feel awful about this '' while he fires you, make him feel better by leaving quietly. RIGHT?
WRONG! Make him feel better with a punch in the face, GIVING him a reason to feel awful.
WHEN your ISP hassles you for money (while the rates continue to rise), just pay them, it's worth it. RIGHT?
WRONG! Tell them certain AOL executives won't be getting their ''special Christmas eCards'' this year, unless your accounts are left intact.
WHEN you're DJing a party, and some punter thinks requests are still cool, you say 'Ok, sure'. RIGHT?
WRONG! Ask them for $1, or $2 for 3 tracks, then tell them where your SLOT is located.
...and that'll do for Winter. Been busy, gang, listen to me at batfreak.sevcom.com
